Thursday, March 19, 2009

Reality: Love it or Leave it?

Reality can be harsh.
The alternative is not living in reality. This certainly feels better most of the time. Maybe acting like someone I am not or faking I can do something I can't or shouldn't do. It's interesting that we call people "insane" or "crazy" who walk down the street talking to themselves, but not people who damage themselves and others around them by being someone they are not and doing something they shouldn't be doing. This is crazy. Our society is insane. At least people with voices in their head rarely do harm to others...I think. And yet we applaud and reward people who strive after some sort of "dream" or ideal kind of life, all the while destroying their own souls and usually those of the people around them. Excuse my language but this is totally f*^!#d up.
I want to live in reality.
In order to take steps toward this I have asked trusted voices in my life to share things with me. Positive and negative. What am I good at? In what contexts do you see me most alive? What are my growth areas? Honestly, the positive feedback is way less helpful than the "constructive criticism." I pretty much know what I am good at and feel pretty good about myself. But when someone offers suggestions in growth areas based on stuff they have seen in real life, in reality, it can be easy to retreat into the dream world. But I won't. Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment, but these words of suggested growth have been like food to my soul. Now comes the digestion part. That is not always as easy as the swallowing part for me. But I'm doing it.
I want to live in reality.