In The Silence

This past weekend I went on a silent retreat with a group of 10 friends. Very interesting time. I love this kind of time. It feeds my soul. But it can also be quite frustrating :-). Here are some words that came to my mind.

In the silence my mind goes, it flows, wandering to and fro.
The thoughts of my beating heart, the feelings of my delicate soul.
Yearning to be heard, longing to be lived, they are speaking to me.
Cutting through and breaking down this callous wall that is
The stuff that seeks to suffocate the Spirit within.
They are telling me who I am.

Father, son, brother, husband, companion, friend, mentor, neighbor, teacher, inspirer, beloved child.
Love, light, compassion, mercy, patience, justice, truth, strength, courage, faith, hope and love.

I hear the whisper.

"These are yours. This is you. Take it and make it who you will be and what you will do.
Trust me, believe that I know what is best, that I will give you rest,
That I am wooing you with open arms into my ever expanding chest.
Follow me. Your soul is safe here, your body will be refreshed.

Your spirit and mind I will shape to be of a different kind
than you even know, as you grow, to be more like me."

In the silence my mind goes, it flows, wandering to and fro.

Ignorance IS Bliss

It's true. Life is a lot more blissful when we don't realize how absolutely jacked (insert any four letter word of your choice) up it is. I became overwhelmed earlier today by this reality. Maybe it was just a funk I was in. Maybe it was the Creator meeting me at a place of deep longing for me; that I would see and love the world and people as He does. But then I ask myself do I really want this? Breaking this ignorance will be the opposite of bliss. I was at a coffee shop and asked the barista if they had any fair trade coffee. She looked at me like I was speaking Chinese (we are in Birmingham right now; they don't speak Chinese here). She had no idea what that meant. Surprisingly to me, a co-worker of hers did. She went to ask her manager if they had any. The did not; but they did have "American coffee" which was not "really bad." (There is probably some truth to this. If the whole coffee-bean-growing-picking process really did take place only in America it is a lot less likely folks were being enslaved). But I wasn't exactly sure what "American coffee" was. Then we were enjoying the Homecoming Parade before the Bama football game. It was my first time to see it (but not my first time to see a game there). It was designed to be a time of celebration. I was having a hard time getting into a celebratory mood. I couldn't stop thinking about the reality of millions of people in bondage at that very moment. Some of it a result of my ignorance or my unwillingness to embrace the reality that my decisions are affecting their lives. (By the way, I decided not to get the coffee.) Thousands of people being tortured, raped, oppressed; the exact opposite of the reality I was experiencing at that very moment. It was kind of bizarre. Kind of heart-breaking. Kind of a feeling of hopelessness. Mostly a feeling of deep sadness and mourning. This is not the Creator's dream for His creation. I wish I could forget it all.

Life...Abundant

At times I am overwhelmed by the preciousness of life. This happens when I look at or think of my daughter, and how small she is, and how precious this time is, and how big she will be some day. I want to embrace and just soak up every moment.

On Being a Dad

Being a dad is amazing. Sometimes it is just too much for me to handle when I look at her. I just want to cry. What a powerful set of emotions.